Saturday, July 09, 2005

Non Scale Targets

It struck me last night that I'm no longer exercising to lose weight. Of course I know that it should have that effect, and I wouldn't have startedhad it not been for that initial aim. But at the moment I'm exercising to train fo the 10k rather than for any other, scale related reason. The reason why this is important is motivation I think. I'm pretty much in uncharted territory, so I don't know how I'll react to various things. In particular, what if I stop losing so fast. Will I get disillusioned? Will I just get to the stage where I ge sick of having to try? By having a clear, non-scale goal I can kind of separate that from my other goals, meaning that even if my eating slips or I lose sight of my weight, I need to keep on running and moving, at least for another 10 weeks.

This time last year the thought of exercising for 10 weeks solid would have been horrific. Now I wonder whether it's enough time, and it's not at all daunting. That is very surprising for me, and shows how far I've come in the past year. I'll hopefully be expounding more on the "in the past year" theme during the week, but in a way I've come full circle. When I first joined the gym last July I didn't do it to lose weight primarily. Yes, I weighed over 18 1/2 stone, and yes I needed to, but I wanted to get fitter mainly. I didn't weigh myself obsessively and I didn't do anything with my diet. I just worked out. I lost a little weight, but I lost it slowly. I wasn't focussing on that as a goal, more as an added benefit. It's only since I reassessed my aims in March that the weight started dropping off. Now, although I'm going to keep up the healthy eating and the weighing to keep myself accountable, I'm back at looking at fitness as an aim in itself, not a byproduct of losing weight.

I've got the tape measure out again. Measurements aren't due for another month, but I like a sneak preview. And even though since 16 June I've "only" lost 2 - 4lb (partly due to holiday, which I'm fine about), the tape measure seems to be tightening again. And my second stage of this is to go to various online stores and check their sizing guides. The good news? It seems that my top is now almost certainly size 16! I've never been top heavy, but the tape measure agrees with the sizes, and says size 16. However, this is not necessarily a good thing. I'm typing this in bed on the laptop and have just looked at my chest. Where the f*** have my boobs gone? I'm sure they were there last night. Well, they're not now. They're practically non-existent. This is not good. They were never huge, but they're certainly not now. Hmm.

Back to the sizes, my bottom half is still more of an 18. But it's now edging towards the bottom of the range of measurements for that size, and it's only a matter of time before it drops down to 16. I've not actually tried any clothes on for a couple of weeks, and might have to do that to test out the sizes in real life, but it's definitely looking more promising.


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