Saturday, August 13, 2005

Feeling Good

It's Saturday morning and all is good in the world. Or if not in the world, in my little secluded piece of it. I've been to the gym, seen some nice looking numbers on the scale (but it's not an official weigh day so I'll just have to keep praying they're there tomorrow), done a decent workout, realised how thin I look in those Gap jeans (US size 14, and I even detect a big of bagginess in places) (Thin being relative, of course), made a start on the big weekend tidy up and started eating well for the day.

Towards the end of the week I finally got my sleeping sorted out. My alarm goes off at 6am during the week for me to go to the gym before work. Which is fine, if I slept til 6am I'd get enough sleep as I go to bed relatively early. But I don't. For the past couple of months I've been waking up at nearer 5.15, unable to get back to sleep. Of course it gives me a chance to mess around on the internet for a while before having to get up (the joy of a laptop you can use in bed...), but it fucks up my energy levels for the rest of the day. I knew I felt crap if I woke up at 5.15, but I couldn't stop doing it.

Then, suddenly, midweek I started sleeping straight through to my alarm. I can't even begin to describe how much better that made me feel. It seems strange that 45 minutes can make such a difference (but then, it can. I mean, look how much difference 45 minutes exercise a day makes). I'm just hoping I can keep this not quite so messed up sleeping going for a while, as it makes me feel so much more human.

I picked up 2 14kg weights at the gym today, out of interest. I couldn't believe how heavy they were! I know that the weight I've lost was more evenly distributed, and not just hanging from the end of my arms, but still. That's so much weight not to carry round with me all the time. I just still don't know how I managed to let my weight get so out of control without noticing earlier. Still, at least it's gone now, and hopefully the habits I've learned during this thing will mean that it never comes back.

I'm feeling remarkably positive today, for some reason. I just hope I'm as positive post weigh in tomorrow!


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