Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Not Good

Yesterday I felt like I was back in control again, but today I seem to be falling off the wagon big style. Well, not really that badly, not comparatively, but compared to where I prefer to be there's a definite downward trend today.

I've been grazing all day. It's not the fact that I'm eating me more that bothers me so much as the way I'm eating. I know that when I run more I need to eat more (one of the best reasons to keep running!), but what I don't expect or like is the way I keep reaching my hand towards food supplies when I'm not even particularly hungry. Just grazing because food's there rather than because I want it. That has to stop. I've cleared everything out of my desk drawers and I'll see how I go tomorrow morning with just one orange to snack on until I get out to get some more at lunchtime.

Work's suddenly gone crazy again. Why do clients think that you can drop everything to do something that they've known about for weeks within hours. Yes, I can draft a development agreement, but if you only tell me about it mid morning you can't have it today. No matter how many times you phone and beg. It's just not happening (neither, incidentally, is my plan to work on it this evening, sadly).

I was feeling shitty and really didn't fancy yoga. I was never going to go, but would have prefered a less crappy excuse than yet more car trouble. It's embarrassing enough calling the breakdown company twice in five days, but my shame was compounded when it was the same bloke who turned up as on Saturday. Yes, I'm shit with cars. (And no, I'm not trying to chat him up or anything by faking spurious mechanical problems...) This time it's because one of the brake shoes has come off, it locked my back wheel causing the tyre to basically burn off. Not a pretty sight. I try to be all environmentally friendly and not drive too much, and how does my car repay me?

The breakdown people have the car at the moment, and will take it to the garage tomorrow. Then I have to hope it can be fixed tomorrow or on Friday, as I need a car on Friday night to drive down to Stansted. Otherwise I could be in the fantastic position by Saturday lunchtime of driving one hire car round Catalonia while a second hire car is sitting in the car park of Stansted airport. I've checked and it's not expensive enough to make me cancel the trip, but I'd still rather get mine back. I don't think it's actually a huge job, so fingers crossed.

So by the time I'd been dropped back off at home yoga had started anyway, and I didn't go. I did have a good 10k run this morning so it's not exactly as though I haven't exercised today, but still it's making me feel down on myself.

I'm just in a generally shitty mood today. I'm hoping it's PMT and not a sign of a deteriorating mental state at the moment. (Plus if it's PMT I might be retaining water and therefore less fatty than the scales say, always look on the bright side!) Fingers crossed that the weekend will cheer me up a bit again.


Blogger Vicky said...

Hey, you've done so well, don't worry about staying at one weight for a little while or missing yoga once. Hope you have a good holiday xx

7:15 AM  
Blogger Shauna said...

arrgh... i hate those days. will cross fingers (and eyes) for ya that the weekend comes quick!

2:04 PM  

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