Thursday, November 29, 2007

Fuck Me Shoes


There was a work networking event. At LK Bennett.

I thought I was safe. I thought their shoes didn't fit. I thought that if I stayed near the shoes I would be OK. I thought that even though it was pay day I would be safe.

And then I tried shoes on. Bad idea. When I first lost weight I was gutted that my feet hadn't got any smaller. I still hated shoe shopping because no normal shops stocked shoes in my size. But although that was annoying, it was safe. I couldn't be tempted by expensive, impractical but utterly buyable shoes.

Except, now my feet are conspiring against me. I saw shoes. I tried shoes on. I thought "mmm... these feel nice. These look nice. I got paid today".

That is a bad thing to think. Particularly when they are plying you with fizzy wine.

"You do realise that sale shoes are non-refundable?". I nod my head, too far gone with lust for the shoes to argue. I hand over a card (it being pay day, I justify it to myself by using a debit card rather than a credit card). I spend far more on a pair of shoes than I 've ever considered spending on shoes before.

But they're lovely. I'm nearly 30. I'm an associate. I'm grown up. I deserve a pair of bow down and worship shoes.

I might not want to be fucked as such, but I want the shoes. Oh god, I want the shoes. And now, wrapped up in tissue paper, and in a posh bag, I have them.

I don't know when I'll dare to wear them without worrying about stepping in a puddle, but I have them. They're mine. And I'll stop stroking them in a few weeks time.


Blogger Zandile said...

Enjoy them! I think sometimes we indulge our inner drag queens far too little! I'm enjoying your blog, I'm training for my first half marathon! Thanks for being one of my regular inspiration stops!

10:31 PM  
Blogger Lightning said...

Of course you need the shoes - think of all the things you've done and not rewarded yourself with lustful objects of desire!

And every girl needs a pair of FM shoes...

10:24 AM  
Blogger t__m__i said...

...And why not? These little things can be just what we need at grotty difficult times like you are enduring now. If you found nice shoes then carpe shoem...

1:09 PM  
Blogger K said...

Sometimes, one needs the shoes.

I speak as a person with an awful lot of shoes.

The other thing is, quality shoes last longer. Honest they do. They might need re-soled or heeled, but that's cheaper than buying new ones.

It's probably lucky my work is never likely to hold an event in a shoe shoe, though...

11:49 PM  
Blogger Kathy said...

How lovely to have a pair of shoes that you don't run in!

Enjoy them.

9:33 AM  
Blogger Trish said...

Do we get to see them? I bought a pair of shoes for a dress for Christmas and then splurged on a pair of fuck me boots that actually fit around my calves. I have lusted after these kind of boots when they came back in fashion but have never been able to find any to fit and be comfortable. I really couldn't afford them, but splurged because for me it was an NSV and I wanted them.

9:51 PM  

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